Jeff Burr’s ‘Puppet Master 5: The Final Chapter’

We are back to Puppet Master and this time it is apparently personal. You know the deal at this point and hopefully don’t expect too much from these films, the supposed final chapter was going to be the end to the series but they decided to carry on with the franchise. This is the 2nd film in the series to be a direct sequel to the previous installment bringing back Gordon Currie, Guy Rolfe and Teresa Hill. Lets dive into this tale of dark goings on in a world beyond the vision of man, a world populated by animated creatures by devious magic. Lets get it on.

Not a Police Station

Not a police station.

So the film opens with the previous protagonist Rick Myer (Gordon Currie) being accused of murder due to the killings at the Bodega Bay Motel. Rick has a witness who would be able to confirm that he did not murder his friends but sadly the witness is his girlfriend Lauren (Teresa Hill) who has fallen into a coma. After hearing his torrid tale of terrifying tools manifested by the god Suketh, the new head of artificial intelligence and Ricks new boss Susie (Chandra West) decides to post bail and help investigate further. Turns out Suketh is still stewing about the whole losing to a mortal thing and takes the drastic action of putting his essence into one the spiky bastards from the last film. With Suketh now on Earth hunting Rick he will need all his friends back again to prove his power, possibly defeat Suketh and save Lauren. Will he suceed witht he help of Obi Wan Toulon (Guy Rolfe)? Will he take the mantle of Puppet Master? What will worry the world of who Suketh be?

Kind of hot

Weird but in a sexy way.

I have watched many bad films in my time, sometimes those films are campy neon drenched madness and sometimes they are boring dull repetitive wastes of celluloid. At this point we have experienced some bipolar quality issues from this series and this film doesn’t help, considering the entry before The Final Chapter was enjoyable on a few different levels, it is even more dissapointing to watch something like this. On the plus side because Suketh has put his essence within a vessel to send to Earth we no longer have to see the awful puppet version but the negative effect of this is we don’t get the slight campy feeling of this obviously awful thing bumbling about. The villains are once again the scabby little things which have no personality or shock value (Especially now they have been used for 2 films).

Suketh Sucketh

If you cannot tell, that puppet has been shot.

The plot plods along and we get to a place that makes sense within the realms of the fictional universe that has been set up, the problem is that the universe has lost it’s most dynamic and interesting character. The sense of a scrambling need to bring back Toulon is evident towards the end when we once again get an appearance from Guy Rolfe giving the same message from Puppet Master 4. There is no use in asking why in this film because we know why, money. Everything wrong with this series is the continuation of a series that should have died but didn’t, it should have died but like Toulon they retcon what they can and revive it.

Still a Puppet

Suketh Sucketh. See what I did there, fucking word boom.

Blargh, well it happened I watched it and now we have to do Puppet Master 6. In terms of a school for this one it gets a David Spade, you’ll remember the past and a little nolstagia will drift in but then you remember what it did later on which makes you sad.

Guy Rolfe

Stop it Guy Rolfe you are better than this!

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